96. The Goonies (1985)

A friend was round the house and wanted to watch a film, so they chose this, as they thought their kids would enjoy it, as they had done at their age. I have to say, I wasn’t dreading it, as my memory had faded, but, oh, god, it was much worse than I remember.

The constant shouting was making me feel ill, and the acting, apart from Josh Brolin and Sean Astin, was lamentable. No wonder so few of them became successful adult actors. And the story was dire beyond belief – maps leading to gold, and the children in the film are being followed by a group of stupid criminals hell-bent on stealing it first. It was annoying, badly written, badly acted and overly sentimental at times.

Only at the end did the friend who chose the film state “I thought there was a scene where they walk along a railway line”. At which point three of us shouted “That’s ‘Stand By Me’!”. So we suffered because he picked the wrong film. Argh.

But the kids liked it, so I guess it did the trick. Maybe I’m just too old.


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